Warning: NSFW language

Happy Endings at Shelf Life Books (Friday, Aug. 29)

It’s storytime Friday at Shelf Life. Happy Endings takes over for what organizers hope will be a monthly slot at the Beltline bookstore. The evening of storytelling features actor Ayla Stephen, photographer Chris Tait, Calgary Herald journalist Zoey Duncan and standup Doug Mutai. If you want an idea of what to expect, tap on a video from a recent event featuring comedian Scoot Laird telling the story of the last family vacation he went on before his parents got divorced or check out Swerve‘s Five Facts from Friday’s magazine. The event starts at 8 p.m. and will only cost you a suggested donation of $5.

X-Fest at Fort Calgary (Saturday, Aug. 30 and Sunday, Aug. 31)

Jack White headlines Saturday night and he wants you to keep your cell phone in your pocket, as he tells Conan O’Brien in the video above. The packed weekend presented by X92.9 FM also features Tegan and Sara, Arctic Monkeys, Death Cab for Cutie, Foster the People, Serena Ryder and more. There are still tickets available for the weekend: $179.50 for both days or $99.99 for single day entry.

Drum & Monkey’s 15th Anniversary Party (Sunday, Aug. 31)

The Drum & Monkey celebrates it’s birthday the only way it knows how: with a day full of bands on a long weekend Sunday starting at 3 p.m. American Sharks, Napalmpom (who have a new album dropping this fall that features a cool colour-your-own cover designed by Geoffrey Hanson), Nosis, Poison Pens, Racket, No Aloha, Soft Cure, Surf Kitties and The Bigfoot Rocketship will keep the place rocking all day and night. Entry is free and there will be swag while it lasts.

Labour Day Classic: Calgary Stampeders vs. Edmonton Eskimos at McMahon Stadium (Monday, Sept. 1)

Tickets are still available ($48.50 to $125.50) for the game which features a matchup of two 7-1 teams on top of the West division. And it looks like it’ll likely be a nice day Monday, too.

Pride Calgary (Until Monday, Sept. 1)

Pride wraps up with events all weekend including a Slow Dance Party presented by We Should Know Each Other on Friday at Endeavor Arts, Hot Mess Pride Brunch and Beer Garden at the always delicious Palomino on Saturday, the Calgary Dyke and Trans* March starting at William Aberhart Park on Saturday and the main event: the Pride Calgary Parade along Stephen Avenue ending with a festival in Shaw Millennium Park on Sunday. For a full list of events (and they’re relevant start times and admission costs), check out pridecalgary.ca.

Bonus Unnecessary Live Stream of the Weekend: Fish Play Streetfighter

The internet is full of clever people who have too much time on their hands. Andrew Hill designed a system so that when his two fish are in different parts of the tank, their motion would activate buttons in Street Fighter II and they would engage in a little virtual combat. Then he started broadcasting it on Twitch TV (which was acquired by Amazon this week for almost a billion dollars). You can watch Aquarius and Robert the Bruce duke it out here. —Jon Roe

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